In my early twenties, I felt isolated, alone and cut-off from life. Drowning in the aftermath of unhealed trauma, consumed with hopelessness and wanting out of the pain gripping my body, mind and soul, I attempted suicide. The gritty truth, is that the dysfunctional struggles of my childhood family system served as ripe backdrop for reactions to subsequent sexual assaults. Yes, there was more than one rape. I blamed myself and slipped into the dark void of shame and unhealthy patterns of coping. I lost all hope.
After consuming a bottle of alcohol and sleeping pills, I managed to call a friend who then reached out to the police to help me. I remember hearing the muffled sounds of the ambulance and the brash lights of the emergency room as people worked on me but it all faded into the background while I slipped from this world into another. At first, a movie seemed to play across my mind’s eye. In full living-color, my life was flashing before my eyes. I saw my infancy, learning to walk and ride a bike; going to school for the very first time. Scene after scene played out before me, while the heaviness of my body slipped beneath me, and then I became consciousness, free from form, slowly rising above it all.
“We’ve lost her,” I heard the muted voice say behind me. Floating into a timeless space, the pull of a brilliant light before me seemed to make me feel peaceful and filled with love. I noticed radiant beings in the distance, becoming increasingly visible and though I could not distinguish features. their benevolence was palpable. The compassion enveloped me and I knew that I was finally going home.
And then, an abruptly distinguished voiced shouted “Come back! Come back into your body now!” Like the piercing drill of an alarm clock, I wanted the sound to stop. But it would not cease. “Come back now! You are not done. Come back now!!“; this male voice shouted in my right ear relentlessly. Swiftly, I fell back into my physical form so fully, all the physical and emotional pain returned.
“She’s back” I heard a female voice in the background shout, as the ER team worked to fully revive me. It seemed, this was not my time to die.
When I regained consciousness in the emergency room, I asked the nurse “Who was shouting in my ear to come back?” She answered sweetly, “No one, honey“. I insisted, “a very firm but comforting male was standing behind me shouting at me to come back! I know he was here. Who was he?”
In her compassionate, yet now mildly condescending tone, she reminded me how the “mind can play tricks on us” during a crisis. But this was no trick. That voice was loud, very real and familiar. That same voice had saved my life as a teen, pulling me from a car that later ended up in a fatal crash. So who was he?
It took time, patience and willingness to discover who was helping me through my darkest moments. This was one of my helping Spirits: an angelic being. He had saved my life. Over time, by cultivating my intuition, I began to realize that even though so much of the physical world had been harsh to me, he was truly compassionate and desiring my highest good. And there were more!
Every person on earth has helping spirits. No matter the religion or spiritual orientation, we are all provided at least one benevolent, compassionate guide in spirit, to assist us throughout our lifetime. Most of us have more than one and many of us have at least three helping Spirits. And yes, angels fall into this category.
Intuition is the language of Spirit. Intuition is the innate sensory ability designed to link us to profound wisdom and healing by surpassing the limitation of the thinking mind. Intuitive processing pulls us out of the reliance on logic by using the physical senses to communicate that which exists beyond the physical world. When highly attuned, the intuitive system can be developed as a conduit for communication with the Divine realms of Spirit. It can bring us breakthroughs in all facets of understanding and deepen our connection to life. It can awaken us to our highest purpose and support us in living our fullest potential.
All of us have access to the remarkable guides who seek only to serve our highest good throughout our lifetime on earth. They are eager to support us in daily choices that will bring us into harmony within our mind, body and spirit. They will not interfere with free-will and only bring guidance that aligns you with the highest love and truth. Helping Spirits always seeks to serve the highest good of all life and I call them the Spiritual Dream Team.
My helping spirit could not prevent me from choosing suicide in a moment of darkness but he did everything in his power to get me to return to my body and choose life. He helped me to face my suffering directly and heal. By learning into the help from the benevolent spirits assisting me, I began to find the courage to live. Eventually, I discovered and learned to cultivate peace, joy and hope.
Helping Spirits are here to serve the Divine within us all and realize our potential. Our logical mind will not necessarily ever grasp this possibility but our intuitive heart will know the truth of their presence, when we suspend judgment and open to the prospect that we are more than what our mind can ever alone conceive.
A version of this story was first published on Mogul.
Read our previous interview with Lori here.
Lori Bella Lipten is a Medium, Psychotherapist, Author, Teacher and Shamanic Guide. She formed Sacred Balance Academy and Healing Center to support individuals in living their best life through ethical intuitive services. They are here to ease suffering and help bridge the gap between ordinary and non-ordinary thriving.